What is romance? Movies and tv would have us believe it's soft music, candlelight, champagne and sex. But we all know you can have all the trappings and still not feel the romance. Romance is all about feeling loved, wanted and cherished. Still, the only way the screen has of depicting feelings is with settings and dialog. If they tried to put all that into the dialog, the actor would sound sappy and insincere. Books have the ability to let us see in to the minds and thoughts of a character so when he says, "You're my whole world and I can't live without you," we believe.
Unfortunately like the screen, in real life all we have is words. No one can see into our hearts and minds and know what we're really feeling. Half the time what we were feeling is so mixed up with our fears and insecurities that even we aren't sure. It seems like once we fall in love, showing someone how we feel should be easy. However, at some time, usually in our teenage years, we gave our heart to someone and they threw it back in our face crushed and mangled. Once it healed, we were more careful, never sharing it again completely, always holding back a little, just in case. And we're afraid of sounding sappy. Yet, we crave those romantic moments.
Romance in real life is elusive. It's difficult to plan, and often happens spontaneously. We can miss it, if we're not careful. For instance, I feel loved and cherished when my husband is yelling at me for not calling when I'm running late when I see the fear in his eyes. Romance is continuing to come home every night to the overwhelming responsibility, chaos and noise not because you have no where else to go, but because you can't stay away. It can be as wonderful and selfless as someone rubbing your tired aching feet, or as simple as feeling someone reach out a hand or a foot in the middle of the night just to touch you.